


Stellar Nurseries

by RationsandSpades



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adora (She-Ra) has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Adora has ADHD, Catra has BPD, Catra has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (She-Ra), Catra still has the zoomies, F/F, Fluff, It's Soft, Mentioned trauma, Oof lots of tags help, mutual pining maybe?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-13 07:46:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29398581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RationsandSpades/pseuds/RationsandSpades
Summary: Adora decided she’d visit Catra. Not because she wanted to make sure she wasn’t having nightmares again, totally not. It was also definitely not because she wanted to see her again. It was also not because she wanted to watch her until she felt safe enough to actually sleep around her, or anything.The Best Friend Squad is on Mara's ship heading for Etheria. This takes place after Shot in the Dark and is the in between the trip to Etheria from Krytis. Some Catradora moments, mostly Adora thinking and her and Catra talking.
Relationships: Adora & Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 43





	Stellar Nurseries

**Author's Note:**

> In advance, want to talk about how much I appreciate all the love shown for my other fics! Thank y'all for that! Also, I realize I haven't posted here for months but that just happens I guess. Ah've had this in my wips since I released Share the Wine and I have at least three others as wips but have yet to touch any of them. I probably won't post any of them. Regardless, onto the show!

Adora decided she’d visit Catra. Not because she wanted to make sure she wasn’t having nightmares again, totally not. It was also  _ definitely  _ not because she wanted to see her again. It was also not because she wanted to watch her until she felt safe enough to actually sleep around her, or anything.

She held the tray of custom food that looked like ration bars. She figured it’d be more comforting for her to have a ration bar-shaped food to eat. It was a mixture of some meat product, probably pork, and something with some sort of nut. She had read out the ingredients of all the things in the kitchen and wrote it all down on a piece of paper for Glimmer. Between them, their memories were about as good as she was at thinking things through before she acted. Ever since the incident with the clones she tried to fight on her own without She-Ra, they wouldn’t let her try and plan anything. She remembered the stinging in her back, how her body tensed up, everything failing to move, then passing out. It had been...an experience to say the least.

Wait, don’t go off-topic, Adora. Focus.

The small bang from outside and the flickering of the lights thoroughly distracted her. She looked up at the lights, transfixed on their flickering.

“I’ve got it!” came Entrapta’s distant, muffled voice.

Her attention was drawn away from them as she heard footsteps and the thudding of hair. Entrapta went to go and put on her spacesuit and fix whatever was going on, probably. A bang resonated through the ship as Entrapta ripped off the vent cover and tossed it haphazardly somewhere in the ship. She heard Glimmer shout something, muffled by the walls.

Anyway.

Bow, after Adora had tried to write out the labels on sticky notes, wrote out the labels himself. Adora smiled at the memory of her failing to remember to write legibly. She had tried, but it took her so long just to write the letter W in a legible way that Glimmer had just snatched the pen from her hand and gave it to Bow to write it. Whenever she had to write extended things she found herself putting so much emphasis on actually writing the word, shaping each letter, that she’d literally forget what she was going to write after the word she wrote. It hurt her brain to write that slow, devoting that much attention to just one word. With the letter to Catra that she never sent, she made sure to write it out in her normal writing; she then promptly rewrote it onto the letter in legible writing. She knew Catra, even after all these years of reading her writing, still couldn’t read it.

It took so long to write anything. How did anyone manage to get anything done? She wrote everything fast, always thinking so hard of the next word that she’d even skip the current word altogether and just write the next one. She remembered how much she hated doing her homework in her classes in the Horde. They always expected her to  _ actually  _ finish her work days in advance because she was a good student. It would take her hours of work to actually bring up the motivation to even do it, looking at it for hours before finally rushing to finish it at the last second. Luckily, though, nobody could ever tell that she rushed it. Nobody could read her handwriting anyway.

_Wait._ _Catra’s food and drink._

She held the tray, balancing the glass of orange juice threatening to spill as she walked forward.

Sure, she was used to holding trays and other weaponry. Well- trays weren’t weapons. They could be used as weapons, sure. In fact, they were very commonly used as weapons. She was used to being hit by trays at this point. Especially by Catra, usually by Catra. It wasn’t malicious, it’d just be that she’d accidentally come too close and Catra would freak out and grab the empty tray and smack her over the head with it, usually playfully, she thought. They would exchange blows, trying to find comfort in one another again. Catra usually hit really hard. A couple of times she had had to nurse a bloody nose or was marked by bruises the next day. Nothing she couldn’t handle, though.

The doors would open by password or button. You had to kind of kick them a couple of times sometimes if they got stuck halfway into opening, which they usually did. They were a bit on the fritz, and old, and definitely not as efficient as Entrapta claimed they were. Granted, there was a way to lock the doors, plus an actual button and password to open them when locked. She knew it’d be Catra’s favorite number as her password, though.

It always was.

Still, she kicked the wall next to the door a couple of times and finally kicked the door itself, tapping it, really, but just a bit too loudly.

“Catra. I’m coming in with your food,” she said. She realized she was a bit too loud when she could hear the muffled cursing in the background coming from Glimmer trying to sleep next door.

It wasn’t late at night, or at least nighttime on a spaceship, but it was late enough that others were trying to sleep. It was way too early to be asleep in her opinion.

She heard someone clear their throat and blinked out of her thoughts.

Catra stood there, hand on the button that opened the door. She was smiling, a soft one that reminded her of the way her fur felt when she ran her fingers through it. It reminded her of the rising sun and the texture of the clouds in the sky.

“Hey, Adora,” she said. She was smiling a bit wider now, “Spacing out again?” she asked. She leaned against the door frame, raising an eyebrow.

“No! I wasn’t,” she said. She stepped in, walking past Catra.

Her tail brushed against the floor, soft enough she could almost mistake it for imaginary wind. “What do you have there?” Catra asked.

The door closed as Adora set the tray down on the bed, “Food, and juice. I figured you’d be hungry.”

“What a gentleman,” Catra remarked.

“Don’t make me regret doing this,”

“Wow, Adora, how rude.”

Adora sighed and stood up. Catra walked over, sitting next to the tray on the bed. She reached for the bar and held it up, “Adora?”

“Yeah?”

“Que porra é essa?”

“It’s a...ration bar?” Adora said hesitantly.

Catra was silent, staring at her with a blank face. The ship hummed and Adora found herself about to space out, eyes fixed on Catra’s, until-

She laughed.

Adora snapped back to the present, eyes widening at the sound of Catra’s laugh. She smiled, watching Catra shake her head.

“You’re such an idiot. Thanks,” she said.

Adora shrugged and found her foot tapping the floor, shaking just a bit.

“Are you bouncing your foot? While standing?” Catra asked.

“Yeah?” Adora, suddenly self-conscious, tried to stop herself from bouncing her foot. That lasted maybe five seconds before she started again.

“You don’t have to stop, it’s fine,” she said. She muttered something under her breath.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Catra took a bite of the semi-ration bar and chewed on it thoughtfully.

Adora stood, bouncing her foot and leg. She decided to walk around the room. She paced, staring at the clothes scattered on the floor and the bits of shredded paper littering random parts of the room. “Where’d you get paper? More importantly, why’d you rip it up?” she asked.

“Sparkles gave me some to draw on. I got frustrated when I couldn’t draw the eye right,” she said, nonchalant.

Adora looked at the paper and squatted down. She squinted, noticing the soft lines along the surface. Was that...her? “Is that me?” she asked. She picked up one of the strips of paper and turned it over, looking for anything else on it.

“Absolutely not. Your face is a lot more angular than that garbage. I was trying to draw someone else,” she said.

Someone else?

She looked at the drawing again. Whoever this someone else was, she was pretty enough. Or at least as pretty as a mostly torn up drawing could get. “Oh,” she said softly.

“What?”

“I didn’t know you were interested in someone,” she said.

A laugh.

Adora looked over. Catra had finished eating her food and was currently holding the orange juice. “Adora. I can’t draw real people for shit. That was just an imaginary person,” she said.

“Oh!” Adora said.

She couldn’t help but feel relieved that Catra wasn’t in love with someone else.

Someone else?

Someone who isn’t me.

She promptly pushed away the thought.

She set the paper down as Catra’s glass clicked against the tray. Catra was looking at her now, an unreadable expression on her face again. Her eyes looked soft though, which was weird to see.

“Hey. Come sit,” Catra said, patting the bed.

Adora stood up, stretching her legs for a second before walking over and sitting on the bed beside her. Well, a little bit away from her. She didn’t know how far away Catra wanted her to sit.

They sat in silence, Adora bouncing her leg and staring at the door. Her mind drifted back to that drawing Catra did of that character of hers.

Why did she look so much like her? It was weird. They had the same facial structure, no matter how much Catra had tried to deny it. It was well-drawn, too. The pencil marks were broad, light, smooth. Her art had grown a lot since she started in the Horde. Catra would always be sitting in the corner drawing something whenever she couldn’t sleep or when she woke up from a nightmare. It happened a lot. She’d always tap her awake, whispering. She’d show off her drawing and Adora would be wide awake, relishing in it. Sometimes they were people, sometimes animals, sometimes mythical creatures. Her art had gotten better over the years. Instead of having eyes too big or heads too small, they were actually proportionate now.

Just like that drawing she did of her, suspiciously.

Did Catra like her? She didn’t even look at her for long. She drew that from memory.

_ How did she remember my face? Does she really look at me so much that she knows my face by heart?  _

“I wasn’t saving them. I was saving  _ you _ , dummy,” she said.

“What?” Adora said, snapping out of her daze. Did she miss something?

“I wasn’t saving them,”

“What?” she asked.

_ Was it when they were younger? Was it when- _

“Back on Krytis when I pushed you and Sparkles and Arrow Boy out of the way; when I jumped at Melog. I wasn’t doing it to save them,” she said. Her face was soft again.

Just for a moment.

In a snap of the fingers, she tensed up. Her tail was wrapped around her legs and she was looking away from her. Her body was hunched over and she was looking away.

“Oh,” was all she could say.

What else was she supposed to say?

“Thanks,” she said instead.

“Yeah, whatever,” she turned away again and looked at the wall.

“Hey. Are you okay?” she asked. She reached a hand out and set it on her shoulder. She squeezed it, feeling her fur brush against her palm. Her body tensed up and she jerked away from her.

“I’m fine.” Her tail flicked at the tip and seemed to wrap a bit tighter around her legs.

Adora frowned and scooted next to her on the bed. She sat there, letting the hum of the ship fill the silence between them. Her hands were settled at her sides. She leaned back, head upturned, and looked at a screw in the ceiling. She sighed again and shut her eyes. Exhaustion settled in her body suddenly. She leaned back, leaning horizontally against the bed. It settled with a soft squeak. She felt a tail brush against her hand and looked over, head lolling.

Catra’s tail was placed on her hand. It flicked at the tip, slowly rising and falling. Catra was silent, still facing away from her. She had her arms at her sides, resting on the covers. Her shoulders were still hunched and Adora imagined she had her eyes closed.

“Come here,” Adora said, voice soft.

She sighed and slowly leaned back. She landed with a thud across the bed. Her legs were draped off the side of the bed. They lay there, staring at the ceiling together. Sleep was starting to get to Adora, weighing her down, making her eyes flutter shut. She tried to keep them open, tried to force them awake.

She was losing. “It’s okay, you know,” she said in a half-asleep slur. “Was it talking about the planet? That caused the flashes to come back?”

A nod.

She got those too, sometimes, the flashes. Mostly of Shadow Weaver and of getting hit by another bot. She tried to ignore the feelings of panic that rose up into her chest when she thought of that, instead, she started rubbing her feet together.

The sound of her feet hitting one another was imperceptible against the sounds of the ship, luckily. She could hear Catra’s labored breathing and almost allowed herself to reach out to try and comfort her. Instead, she shut her eyes and looked up at the ceiling. If she wanted her to comfort her, she’d let her know.

“Hey,” came Catra’s voice after Adora was on the edge of falling asleep.

She turned her head and made no further response.

“If you’re going to sleep here, at least sleep in a normal way,” she said.

She still didn’t move.

Catra finally shifted with a sigh and crawled up so she was oriented properly along the bed.

Adora followed suit. She lay there, keeping her distance. It reminded her of when they slept together, holding one another, her drifting off to sleep to Catra’s purrs.

She almost wanted to do it again but decided against it, sleep drawing her away. She curled up, legs tucked in and arms under her head. She finally shut her eyes, letting herself give in to sleep.

“Take your ponytail out first at least,” Catra said.

She took down her hair and put the hairband around her wrist. She settled again. Her legs twitched under her. She bounced her feet, tapping them against the bed.

It was way too quiet for her comfort.

“You never got rid of that habit even after all these years,” Catra said, a murmur.

Adora’s foot finally stopped, she slipped into the realm of the unconscious, sinking into a deep sleep.

She swore she felt the brush of Catra’s fur against her back before she fell asleep.

-

When she woke up, Catra was gone.

She felt around the bed, thinking that maybe she had moved down to her feet. When she wasn’t there, she shot up, looking around the room.

She was in the corner. Her shoulders were hunched again and her fingers were digging into the tan fur on her arms. Her claws dug into her skin, her body all tense and hard, scared.

Was she shaking? Was she okay? Maybe she should ask her if something was wrong. Did she have another nightmare? The scar on her nape, a pale beige, seemed almost white in the soft lighting. Maybe she needed some space? Maybe she should give her some space. What if she needed some help though?

Adora’s foot twitched and bounced again, she was tapping at the bed with her fingers. Catra’s ears perked for a moment at the sound. They flattened again and her tail wrapped around her legs again. It sounded like she was crying, breaths shaky in the darkness.

“Catra?” Adora said.

No response. Her fingers curled into her arms a bit tighter.

“Hey,” she said. She rolled off the side of the bed and walked towards her. She sat down a distance away and scooted a bit closer to her. “Are you having nightmares?”

A nod.

She remembered her past dreams. She’d be fighting against Catra in the war again. She’d slip up, using her full She-Ra strength against her, hurting her in some way. She’d stop moving, breaths coming out in shaky gasps, just like when she held her in her arms on Prime’s ship.

She looked at Catra again.

Breathing, warm, tail moving.

Alive.

She put a hand on Catra’s shoulder. She tensed up and Adora drew her hand back the slightest bit. Catra’s hand rested on hers and squeezed gently. They sat in silence again, sitting there.

The mechanical humming of the ship, a faded grey, soft, a constant in the silence of space and the space between them.

“We should go. I could use some food right about now,” Adora said after some time. She heard a sigh. “You know I can’t pass up food. I’m just hoping that Glimmer and Bow didn’t slobber all over it. They were probably making out in the kitchen. Do you think any of the food’s burnt? It probably is- I mean- I’d be pretty distracted too if I were making out with someone while cooking. I really hope the food isn’t burnt. I would hate to eat another one of Glimmer’s attempt at a sandwich I mean- how do you even mess up toast that badly? I don’t know when it started but I’ve loved to eat toast in the morning. Everyone says I eat way too much but- an entire loaf isn’t that much, right? I’ve eaten  _ way  _ more food than that back when we were in the Horde. It’s been so long since then and I remember I used to eat at least four ration bars somehow. I was so hungry always and-”

Catra’s chuckle made her stop. Adora smiled and squeezed her shoulder. Her foot was bouncing, tapping against the floor. “You’re an idiot. You know that?” Catra said. “I mean- how do you eat that much bread in one sitting?”

“In my defense, I’m always hungry,”

“I know. You always went for fourths back in the Horde,” Catra shook her head, she could see a smile gracing her features, “moons, always so hungry. How did we even feed you?”

Adora smiled and ran her hand in hopefully soothing strokes through her fur. Catra rested her hand on it and shut her eyes.

_ Her fur is so soft. It feels like silk. Is this what a kitten feels like? Man, I’m hungry...Seriously, though, were they actually doing that in the kitchen? That’d be gross. I’d hate to have Bow germs all over the food. If I find hair in my dumplings I’m actually going to kill them. I wonder if Catra likes dumplings. The last time we ate together she seemed to like it. Maybe she’ll hate it this time. It’s- _

Catra was looking at her now, a smile still on her face. “Hey, Adora.”

Adora blinked a couple of times, “What?”

“You’re spacing out again,” she said.

“Yeah- you’re right. Heh, sorry.”

“Whatever, it doesn’t matter. Now come on, let’s go raid the kitchen before Sparkles wakes up. Every time I run around the ship she’s always awake. I want to use these precious six minutes she’s asleep to do something in peace.”

“You run around the ship? Okay- she’s not  _ that  _ bad,”

“Debateable. Don’t you remember when I’d- I don’t know- run around everywhere at one in the morning back at the Horde, though?” she said.

Adora chuckled, “I remember Octavia always yelling at you to stop but I never knew what it was about.”

“Of course you wouldn’t. You’re as observant as a rock. Anyway, let’s go. I’m starving,” Catra said. She stood up and held out a hand.

Adora took it and Catra pulled her up. They stood there, neither of them really moving.

Silence.

Blue eyes met heterochromatic ones.

Catra kept looking at her. Her eyes softened ever-so-slightly and she squeezed her hand. She rested her head against her shoulder, took a breath in, and leaned back to look at her again. She seemed like she was about to say something, but stopped. Instead, she smiled, a small, almost intimate one.

Adora smiled back and squeezed Catra’s hand, having not let it go since being pulled up. “Let’s go.”

“You forgot about the tray,” Catra said.

“Oh, right. Thanks for reminding me,” Adora said. She squeezed Catra’s hand again and let go. She walked towards the bed and picked up the tray and held the empty cup with her other hand. She held the tray by the edge with her left hand, making sure the plate wouldn’t slide off of it and land on the floor. It would be one thing to have a dirty plate, but another to have to clean up shards of ceramic from off of the floor. The tray lilted and she adjusted her grip so it was a bit steadier. “Alright, let’s move,” she said.

Catra waited for her to move, arms crossed until Adora walked over and stood behind her. She walked forward. Her tail was twitching at the tip, occasionally moving in languid motions.

Happy, content. That was her body language she had come to memorize. She remembered the way Catra had sat in her lap while she was trying to focus on manifesting the sword since saving Catra on Prime’s ship. Her tail had been waving a bit, rubbing against her face while she purred. It was...really nice at the time.

Adora held the tray precariously in one hand as she tried to open the door.

“Need some help there, Princess?” Catra asked.

“Yes, please,” Adora said. The relief in her voice was probably audible to every person on the ship as she stepped back.

Catra walked forward and pressed the button off to the side of the door. The door opened up, a quick slide with a whirring sound. Catra looked at her and gestured with her hands, a smile on her face. “After you,” she said.

Adora rolled her eyes and kicked her in the leg, temporarily knocking herself off balance. She laughed at the responding yelp that Catra made. She barely dodged her responding attack, running toward the kitchen as fast as she could. By the time she got there, Catra caught up. She smashed against her, throwing her forward and into the door to the kitchen. “Okay, okay, you win,” Adora said. She pushed herself off it, bumping into Catra’s chest with her back. She turned around, finding herself face-to-face with the magicat.

“Hey, Adora,” Catra said.

“Hey…” her voice was softer than she intended.

“You ever heard of personal space?” Catra said, arms at her sides but hands twitching.

“I don’t know. Have you?” Adora asked, bumping her with her shoulder. “Can you open the door for me again?”

“Is that all I’m good for now? Opening doors?” Catra said with mock hurt, “Man, Adora. Thanks for making me feel special.”

“You are special, geez,” Adora muttered.

“What was that?” Catra asked. Adora’s words had been muffled by the sound of the door opening.

“Nothing,”

A raised eyebrow, but no further response.

She walked in. Inside, the kitchen was surprisingly tidy. Things were in their proper place, not a single speck of food covered anything. The kitchen itself was tidy and neat. The food was organized alphabetically and by food group.

“Wow. Didn’t know you had it in you to be clean, Adora,” Catra said.

“This wasn’t my work,” she said incredulously as she set the tray on the counter and the dishes in the sink.

“I know. You’re way too messy to actually do anything like sort rooms or put things back. Last time you tried to organize something you lost our crayons.”

“Okay, that was one time,” she turned on the water and started to clean the dishes.

“Uh-huh, sure. I can also see every color of the rainbow now, too,”

Adora rolled her eyes. She turned off the water as she scrubbed the plate. The soap suds bubbled up. The room started smelling of soap and warm water. Luckily, the water didn’t have a texture that made her teeth start hurting. Of course, the water itself burned her hands according to Catra’s observation of the first-degree burns covering her hands, but how could she notice that?

“You need some help?” Catra asked. She peeked around her shoulder, ears perked.

“I got it, thanks,” she said. She started to wash the cup, eyes focused on each part of the glass. She was honestly surprised there was glass on the ship, to begin with. You’d think that having glass dishes on a ship that was rickety and prone to shaking would be a disaster for them. Surprisingly, though, the cupboards managed to stay closed even when the ship moved around like it was her foot shaking the whole thing.

Her attention focused on washing the dishes. She got the sponge and started to scrub the inside of the glass.

Naturally, her mind started to wander again.

_ Where even was Melog? Did they wander off somewhere? Where were they? Usually, they were around Catra at all hours. Seriously, it was impossible to separate the two, always so clingy to one another. _

She had once seen Catra crouched down next to Melog, stroking their fur and listening to their purrs with a sad look in her eyes. She was on the verge of tears. She had decided not to mention her seeing it when she had. At the time, they had been sleeping in the same bed because it always reminded them of being back in the Horde again.

It was comforting, okay?

She set the cup on the drying rack and shut off the water. She flicked her hands a couple of times and grabbed the towel to dry them off. Her eyes wandered to the fridge next to the sink. She could see Catra standing next to it, doors open, head leaned in, grabbing at whatever she could. “Are you seriously still hungry?” Adora asked. She draped the towel back over the hook.

“Yeah? Wasn’t that what we came here for? I’m looking at what you guys have,” she said. She leaned back, holding something with First One’s writing on it. “What’s this?”

Adora looked at it, squinting. “Vegetable paste,” she said.

Catra considered it, turned it over as if to try and read it, and put it back. She took out another thing. It was in a small, blue box. “What’s this?”

“I can’t read it,”

Catra stretched her arm, holding the box closer to her.

“Oh! That says ‘Fish and dried pecans.’ Yum?” she said.

“It actually sounds good. It’s probably better than whatever you gave me last night, earlier, I lost track of time,” Catra said as she set the box back into the fridge.

“Hey! I worked hard on it! I spent at least an hour just blending it up, I cooked it in the oven, I ground it up again, pressed it into a block, and put it- are you listening?”

“Mhmm, yep. Totally,” Catra said as she took out another box. She held it out to Adora again.

“What’s this say?”

Adora grabbed the box. “Come on, Catra! You have to admit that it was a kind gesture at least.”

“It was, don’t worry. What’s that say though?”

Adora turned the box, looking over the printed text, “Heat to 165 degrees, cook for-”

“What is it?”

Adora turned it over again, “It’s chicken.” She handed back the box and Catra took it with a slow hand. Her claws audibly dragged against the container and Adora winced.

Catra didn’t seem to notice it as she put the container back into the fridge again. “Geez. Why couldn’t they write anything here in some language we actually know?”

“Because this is a  _ First One’s  _ ship, Catra,”

“Yeah but- the least they could’ve done is translate it.”

Adora sighed and looked around the kitchen again. She leaned against the sink. Catra continued to rummage through the fridge. She was humming.

“What’re you humming?” she asked.

“Nothing,”

Adora made an unconvinced noise and continued to look at the ceiling again.

She recognized her humming this time. Catra was starting to sing, ever-so-slightly, almost inaudible against her humming.

_ “We’re on the edge of greatness...turning darkness to light…” _

Adora shut her eyes and listened to her sing. She only sang when she was feeling really comfortable. The last time she had was back when they were cadets at the Horde. Adora was laying in bed, on the edge of sleep, when she heard soft singing behind the sounds of purring.

_ “We’re right behind you ready to fight…” _

“We must be strong,” Adora said, more of a hum than actual singing.

She noticed Catra flatten her ears.

“I haven’t heard you sing in years,” Adora said.

“Well, yeah. I haven’t been around y- comfortable for years. So, duh.”

“Where did you learn that?” Adora asked.

“You guys would always sing it every time we were in battle. It was your battle cry or whatever,”

Catra said. She shut the door and stared at it.

“You never had one?”

Catra shrugged, “Never needed one.”

Adora looked at her. Catra turned away from the fridge and leaned against it. She shut her eyes and took a shaky breath.

Purring.

Adora looked away again and looked at the counters across the room. “We must be strong, and we must be brave…” she said. She couldn’t sing, but that was fine. She could sing well enough if she did it quietly.

“We’ve gotta find every bit of strength that we have and never let it go…”

“We must be strong,”

“And we must be brave,”

“We’ve gotta find every bit of strength that we have and never let it go,” Adora sang, eyes shut, mostly humming the tune.

“We’re bound to this struggle with mighty sword and flame,”

“We’ll never fail you when you call our name,”

“Together, we’ll be heroes,” Catra kicked her in the shin and smiled.

Adora yelped and looked at her with a frown, “Joining forces as one- What was that for?”

“Strong as the steel we carry, we rise like the sun,” Catra said with a smile.

_ How dare she not answer my question. _

“We must be strong,” Catra sang. She had her eyes shut again, her purring was a soft, steady sound. It almost matched the...beat...of the song. “And we must be brave,”

Adora mainly stood there, listening to her sing. She went quiet, listening to her. What else could she really do?

Catra was...getting pretty into it now…

Adora was still kind of hungry and Catra was standing in front of the fridge, but she didn’t want to bother her. She also hadn’t sung for...six years? Was it ten? How old was she?

“‘Cause we’re warriors, we are unstoppable, nothing’s gonna get in our way,”

“We’re gonna win in the end…” Adora said, a whisper.

Catra looked at her through a cracked eye and looked back ahead. She stopped.

“Come on~ I know you like singing~,” Adora said, nudging her with her foot.

“Shut up,” Catra said, a chuckle in her voice. “You’re annoying, and loud, and an idiot,” she said.

Adora smiled, “Awww, Catra loves me~”

Catra chuckled and Adora saw her smiling a small smile, “Yeah...I do…” Her face fell again and she mumbled something she thought was in Spanish.

Adora pulled away. “Wait, what?”

“Nothing,”

She leaned against the sink again and sighed.

“Hey, Adora,” Catra said. Her voice had a soft, almost shaky quality to it.

Adora looked over. Catra was looking at her with a smile, her arms were at her sides. She walked until she was standing in front of her. She reached out, hands cupping Adora’s cheeks.

She leaned forward and pressed her forehead against hers.

Adora stood there, silent, suddenly very aware of how sharp her claws were. Eventually, she reached a hand up and pressed it against Catra’s.

The ship hummed around them.

Catra looked up, meeting her eyes. She smiled and blinked slowly.

_ I love you. _

“You’re an idiot,” Catra said.

“I know,”

“I missed you,” she said in a whisper.

“You did?”

“Yeah, dummy, I did,”

“That’s so embarrassing. You like me?”

“Oh sweet-” Catra broke off, sighing, “why do I even bother…”

She was smiling, though, so that was reassuring.

She took a breath, eyes shut, “Adora, I-”

The door opened and the two promptly jumped away from one another. Adora stood there, stiff and holding her breath.

Glimmer walked in, hair mussed and eyes tired. “Catra, you sing great, but can you two  _ please  _ go to sleep?”

Catra relaxed first and crossed her arms, “What? Did we disturb your little beauty nap?”

“We’re trying to actually  _ sleep, _ Catra,”

“It’s way too early to sleep, Sparkles,” a shrug.

“Thank you!” Adora said, a bit too loudly based on Glimmer’s visible twitch.

“Bow and I didn’t grow up in a military camp. We sleep like normal people. It’s 3 in the morning, I’m going to sleep. If you wake me up again I’ll launch you out of the airlock,” Glimmer said.

“Yeah, whatever,”

Glimmer looked at Adora.

“Okay. Sorry, we’ll be quieter.”

“No. Not quieter.  _ Asleep. _ ”

“Okay. We’ll go to sleep.”

Glimmer, seemingly satisfied, walked out of the kitchen and toward her room. Her back was hunched and she looked a step away from death.

After she left, Adora looked at Catra, “Is it really that late?” she asked.

Catra grumbled, “Apparently,” and scratched her neck. “I’m going to sing again. I’m going to sing as loud as I can,” she said.

“Catra,” Adora said in a low voice.

“ _ Fine.  _ I won’t. As long as you keep her away from me,” she said.

“Deal,” Adora said. She remembered something. “Hey, Catra?”

“Hmm?”

“What were you going to say...before Glimmer came in?”

“I was going to tell you I’m tired. I’m going to crash,” she said. The way her voice sounded clipped and the way she seemed to tense up made her think otherwise.

“Before you eat?”

Catra cursed, “How could I forget?” She turned around and opened up the fridge. With tired eyes, she grabbed a red container and frowned, “What’s this?”

“A red box?”

“This is red?” Catra said. She looked at Adora with a frown.

“Yes, Catra. It’s red,”

“Cool. What does it say?” she pressed it into her face.

Adora grabbed the box and pulled it down, grabbing it from her. “Spicy macaroni and cheese?”

“Neat. We’re eating it,”

“Aren’t you lactose intolerant?” Adora asked. She looked up at Catra, “Also have you ever eaten anything spicy before?”

“We have to suffer for our hubris, Adora. Dairy tastes great,”

“Is it worth it?”

Catra looked at her with passion in her eyes, “Give me the pain pasta, Adora, or so help me I will-”

-

They ate in silence, sitting on the kitchen floor. Adora was on her second serving, to which Catra raised concerns about how much she was going to regret eating it. “I’m not lactose intolerant,” Adora pointed out as she scooped another spoonful of macaroni into her mouth. It burned from the chile but man, it tasted good. Catra was pushing the food around the plate and looked hesitant. “Where’s the cocky Catra from an hour ago?” she asked.

“I’m  _ thinking _ ,” Catra said.

“That sounds painful,”

“Maybe for you, it is, not for me,” Catra said. She stabbed a clump and held it up. She sniffed it and frowned.

“I can get you some other food? You really don’t have to-”

Catra shoved the forkful into her mouth and chewed it maybe three times before swallowing it.

Adora waited.

Catra stared at the food.

Adora smiled.

Catra’s fur was standing up and she looked like she was in pain.

“What? Too spicy?” Adora asked.

“Anything is spicy when you live with a bunch of Etherians that think that  _ pepperoni _ is spicy,” Catra said, voice strained.

“Sure,” Adora said. She continued to eat her macaroni. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Catra actually twitch as she continued to eat more of it. “You don’t have to eat it,” she said.

“I’m doing it. It tastes good,” Catra said. Her eyes were watering.

“I mean- it does, but you’re also  _ really  _ going to regret this in…” she looked at the clock, “twenty minutes.”

“Worth it,” another forkful.

Eventually, she finished it just as Adora finished up the rest of the macaroni in the container. It was  _ supposed  _ to feed a small family of seven, but whatever, she just really liked cheesy things.

-

Adora had to lean against the wall next to the bathroom as she waited for Catra to finish being sick for her hubris. “Am I the only smart one here?” Adora muttered.

“You’re an idiot,” came Catra’s weak call from behind the door.

“I know,” she said with a sigh. “At least I’m not dumb enough to eat milk when I know I can’t eat dairy. How did you become ‘The Strongest in the Crimson Waste’?” she asked.

“I killed  _ Tung Lashor  _ and stole his whip. Sparkles blew it up,”

“Tung Lashor? Seriously?” Adora said with a hard scoff.

“I know, right? That’s what I said. I don’t know who came up with it. He wasn’t hard to beat.”

“How did you do that?”

“Eh, tossed him into some quicksand and stole his whip,” she sounded like she was shrugging.

“You killed him? For his whip?” Adora asked with a small squeak in her voice.

“Eh, worth it. Managed to beat you in, I don’t know, a minute?”

“It was forty seconds…” Adora muttered, arms crossed.

“Yeah, forty seconds.”

The sound of rushing water.

Adora counted the seconds.

The water shut off.

“That wasn’t long enough, Catra,”

“ _ Fine. _ ”

The water turned on again.

Adora shut her eyes, leaning back and finding her breathing steady.

_ That was a new record. She actually spent thirty seconds washing her hands this time. Maybe one day I can convince her to actually take a bath. Why does she have to lick herself clean? It makes her smell like spit and, honestly? Her breath doesn’t smell that good most of the time- why is she taking so long? What is she doing in there? Is she panicking? Should I check up on her? Maybe I’ll check on her again, maybe she’s not doing good. I’ll- _

She turned around and knocked on the door. There was a squeak inside. “Catra?”

“Yeah?”

“What’s taking you so long?”

“I’m checking to make sure I don’t have anything stuck in my teeth, geez,”

“There wasn’t even anything that could get stuck in your teeth in there,”

“The pasta was undercooked.”

“Hey! It said an hour!” Adora said.

“It said an hour and a half.”

“It did not! I can read First One’s writing and it definitely said an hour,” Adora said, crossing her arms at the shut door.

“Or until the noodles are tender. Do you even listen to yourself when you talk?”

“I say something, it’s out there, everyone else can deal with it after that,” Adora said.

“How did you become the leader of the Rebellion, again?”

Adora kicked the door and Catra yelped. “I’m smarter than you, that’s how.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure!”

The door opened and Catra came out covered in water, it clumped her face fur together and she looked tired.

“Did you dunk your head in the toilet?” Adora asked.

“I washed my face,” Catra said. She shrugged and walked toward her room.

Adora thought she was going to stop at hers, but she kept walking. “Isn’t your room back there?” Adora asked.

“You mean the room that was supposed to be the supply closet? Yeah. I want to sleep in an actual room,” Catra tried to open the door, only for it to flash something in First One’s language on a small screen. “What’s that say?” she pointed to it.

“Password needed. I got this,” Adora said. She walked past her and looked at the screen. Her finger hovered over the numbers written in the First One’s language. She frowned, curling her finger.

“Seriously?”

“I got this,” Adora said. Exhaustion was getting to her, her vision was starting to blur a bit.

_ Oh! Right! _

She typed in the password, converting the letters to numbers.

_ Eternia. _

The door opened up with a slide and she walked in, waiting for Catra to join her. She shut the door with a clumsy shove on the button and collapsed in a heap onto the bed.

_ Wait. _

“Did I ever put my hair back up?” Adora asked.

“You  _ just  _ realized that now?” Catra asked with a chuckle.

“I did. Hey, now I don’t have to worry about taking it down,” she said. She oriented herself so she was facing the right way and curled up, legs bent, arms under her head.

She felt a shifting of weight at the bottom of her bed as Catra crawled and curled up at the foot of her bed.

They fell asleep that night like that; Adora had her legs bent and Catra slept at her feet. Her snores were a comfort as she fell asleep, even if she was shaking her foot the entire time she was drifting off and shaking the bed enough for it to squeak a little bit. Catra made no comment. If anything, she was purring again. Maybe the shaking was a comfort to her.

Her snores reminded her of their times in the Horde, the time Catra draw them on the wall, sleeping with her at her feet whenever Catra heard Adora jerk herself awake while “Fighting in her sleep”.

She never understood that. She thought to ask Catra about it. Maybe she’d know why she did that.

That could wait for tomorrow, though. Tomorrow, when they would be just one step closer to going back to Etheria.

Tomorrow, always waiting for tomorrow.

Catra purred at the foot of the bed, filling the room with the sounds of her sleeping.

**Author's Note:**

> The fic was inspired by the poem Certificate of Live Birth by Jasmine Reid. It's a nice poem ahm gonna be real with you. I headcanon Adora as having ADHD because literally doesn't everyone at this point? Also Catra has BPD but we all figured that by now. I was also inspired by my shit brain whispering to me "I didn't do it to save them. I did it to save you." and I twisted that into this fic because I have no self-control.


End file.
